#get flashbanged idiot

[tinnedmarlin]

FULL BRIGHT

[jigencaps]

[the-oracle-stone]

me, when I tried to cook one

Can't help but imagine some poor bastard in Hyrule finding a dazzlefruit for the first time, taking a bite, and getting flashbanged in the face.

[fyllophobia]

never knew what hit him

[yankee-in-wyndon]

Magic anon, a smiting, your fine though it's just light and sound

[automatic audio recording]

"huh?"

There's the sound of something metallic hitting the floor, followed by a loud noise.

"FUCKIN' HELL!!!"

[tahnisreu]

if any of ya'll wanna ever co-op in fop you're more than welcome to add me : heartonpins (PSN)

[yurischolar]

My mom did this to our old lady by accident...sea urchin....

[atypi-cals]

I feel like there's some sort of demon clinging to my shoulder causing my insomnia...

[batsybat91]

You've left the house to go grab some groceries, leaving Ghost all by himself. It was cute, trying to make him smile like that. You and him have never really... spoken before. To be honest, he thinks that might be the first true interaction you've had with him beyond, "Hey, did you do your chores yet?"

He calls Soap immediately. Soap went on vacation two days ago to visit home. When the Scottish bloke finally picks up, he sounds more than annoyed. "What is it now, ya daft idiot?"

"I haven't called you since you've been gone," Ghost retorts.

"Ye dinnae kill our sweet little roommate, did ye?" Soap asks, clearly repressing a groan. "Ach, I knew I shouldn't 'ave left you 'ome with her! It's like leaving a lion home to watch an antelope."

"Johnny. I haven't touched her," Ghost replies, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Then whyyyyy are ye callin' me?" he drawls.

"Because... she - bloody hell, Johnny - she told me terrible jokes last night, tryin' to get me to smile. Or laugh," sighs Ghost. "And it's the cutest fuckin' thing I've ever seen."

Soap is silent on the other end for a moment. Then the bastard starts snickering. "Aye, I see how it is. Someone's got a wee crush on our dear girl!"

"Don't call it a crush. That's childish," Ghost growls. "Listen, Johnny, what do I do about it?"

"Could just tell 'er."

"No."

"Could drink it away, then."

"No."

"Well, damn, Simon. Just keep shootin' me down, why don't ya?"

"Have better ideas, asshole."

"I dunnae know what you want me tae do!"

"How do I talk to her? What does she like?"

"Aren't ye Mr. Womanizer? I'm pretty sure you've had 15 hookups since she's lived with us!"

"It's different! She's not a one-time thing!"

"She likes colorin' books." Soap finally relents. "And concerts."

Ghost sighs in relief. He can work with that. "Thanks, Johnny."

"You're not welcome," he scoffs. "Don't call me again 'less it's an emergency! Em-er-gen-cy!"

"Right, right, I got it," Ghost grumbles, hanging up the call.

When you get home, Ghost helps you unload the groceries and put them away. You look at him like he's grown another head. But you don't say anything until after the groceries are put away. "Someone's social today," you tease.

"I hear you like coloring books," he blurts.

You feel like you've been flashbanged. Your ears start ringing, and you blink at him a few times to recover. "Yeah, doesn't everyone?"

"Can you show me?" he whispers.

Another dazed look appears on your face. You shake your head to clear it. "Who are you and what have you done with Simon Riley?" you laugh, poking him in the chest. "I thought you didn't talk."

"I want to talk to you," Ghost says, his brown eyes filled with such... emotion. You couldn't name it if you tried. A deep sorrow, perhaps. But that isn't enough to describe the look that was in those wet, brown eyes.

"Alright" you concede. "Let's color."

Part I

Part III

[bugcitie]

get flashbanged idiot

[pinkiepig]

One of many Narilamb comics in the pits that is my procreate gallery. Get flashbang idiot cat

[mikaorangeart]

I call this one "CMYK" aka "I can't believe I managed to do this in a single afternoon" aka "get flashbanged idiot lol"

No readmore this time. You're watching the timelapse whether you like it or not

[l0s3rd0wnt0wn]

No just hear me on this one

Danny x wb!reader x Conner

I HEAR YOU LOUD AND CLEAR!!!

Those boys are cuddly, and you'll wake up sweating because of them. Don't even think about leaving the bed to go pee; they'll just wake you with those blue eyes staring right into your soul. Speaking of blue eyes, they flashbang you every time you look at them, like Conner with his unusually bright blue eyes that glow like a flashlight in the dark. Catching Danny in the kitchen at night is like finding your cat standing on your kitchen island; those bright green eyes are blinding. In the middle of the night, you wake to them hitting you like heat rays, and they play rock-paper-scissors to see who gets to spend time with you. They're both idiots, so it ends in a draw. Without warning, they like to hit you with a "Would you love me if I were a worm?" and you obviously say no. They share a brain, and the longer they're together, their brains become room temperature, but you love them nevertheless.

[questionablecuttlefish]

how did u get into lightcannon? and what made u like the ship so much?

Late 2010s. Not a league player. See Get Jinxed. That character's pretty fun!

See the Wild Rift Trailer. Hey it's Jinx! Hahah she kidnapped a samurai, a robot and a Disney princess. That's fun.

I know the samurai is Yasuo and I think the robot is Blitzcrank but who's the Disney princess? She and Jinx sure have cute energy.

Be a Touhou fan, find out that League of Legends has a character called "Lux" who is 'a ripoff of Marisa Kirisame' and 'uses lasers'.

Not give enough of a shit about League of Legends to put two and two together.

See Arcane Season One.

Holy fuck that was amazing, and REALLY FUCKING sad! Jinx is my new blorbo of all time and I JUST WANT HER TO BE HAPPY!

Wait when is Jinx going to meet her blonde friend?? WHERE'S THE DISNEY PRINCESS?

Wait THAT'S LUX??

Wait they've never met in canon!?

Find out about Star Guardian and watch Burning Bright, learn that people ship them and it's called Lightcannon.

Read a few fanfic, including early-days Flashbangs & Frag Grenades, 100 Ugly and Beautiful Words, The Answer, and Don't Lose My Number.

Oh my god, this ship is amazing. Who IS this character?

Read her bio, Last Light, Flesh and Stone, For Demacia, and the Lux Comic.

Realize that Lux's backstory meshes and parallels perfectly with Jinx's.

Be compelled to write Angel on your Shoulder and Devil on Mine.

Be compelled to go further and write Ill-Omen's Light.

Be accursed and afflicted to forever fly my freak flag for these two idiots, come what may. 💛💙

[aurae-rori]

DR RATIO ANALYSIS: PART 2, ELECTRIC BOOGALOO

SPOILERS FOR 2.1 CONTENT.

Now, you might be saying - "Aurae, you already did one, why do you need a second?" And my answer is, "LORD, I FORGOT TO TALK ABOUT HOW HIS DEFINITION OF 'IDIOT' IS DIFFERENT. AND ALSO HE DOES NOT HATE AVENTURINE NOR DOES HE THINK AVENTURINE IS STUPID." Once again, here is my disclaimer - although I have been researching psychology for a solid six years, I am NOT a professional. (I will be, one day. Just you wait, just youuuu wait-) So understand that everything I say has been analyzed with personal judgement, with my own conclusions, come to with logic and my personal interpretation. This is just what I have concluded, and you are always free to disagree.

This is my legacy. To be an analyzer. So let's go.

Okay, now that my disclaimer is over, let's take off Ratio's plaster head and chuck it into the sea, and see - what does he mean by 'idiot'?

This will be much shorter than my last, so don't worry - I will not be flashbanging you with another 4k words. This is more like a follow up, than anything else, because there's a few things I wish to touch on.

Dr. Ratio doesn't hate idiots in the sense that he hates people that have 'low IQ' or are 'stupid' in terms of being 'slow to understand'. I definitely touched on this in my last analysis, but he hates people who take their education for granted and don't go places with the gifts that they've been given. He hates "idiots" - "narrow minded" people who have the capabilities to do more and perceive more than they choose to do. People who deliberately look away or take what they know and what they could do for granted. He wants to open people's eyes and allow them to see life from multiple different angles and he believes that everyone should have a chance to learn - with the whole "knowledge for everyone" thing he's got rolling.

He wears a plaster head around people he doesn't seem to know too well in order to think more, or so that he doesn't have to see the faces of the people he dislikes. Pretty good roast. However, he does NOT wear that plaster head around Aventurine. Let's listen to the doctor's judgement - Aventurine is far from stupid. Although he likes to chalk up a lot of the things he does to his own luck, he is an INCREDIBLY capable individual who's managed to get this far because of his own form of genius. He's a man who relies on chance and good fortune, yes, but his charm, his way of scheming, and the way that he's good with people? That's skill. A talent he doesn't take for granted. Dr. Ratio respects him for this - because despite the fact that he has no proper education, he has his eyes wide open to the world and doesn't take shit for granted. He learns what he can in order to survive and he does it fucking well - Aventurine is a very smart man. He's observant, quick on his feet, and great at going with the flow and thinking in the moment.

Aventio aside, I actually believe that Dr. Ratio would be a really good teacher to those who struggle. He's patient where it's needed to be, even if he's got a quick temper, and I believe in his pursuit for knowledge he would do his best to go out of his way to find strategies that would work for their individuals. We're all unique, and he's aware of this - and because he wants to allow people to think for themselves, whatever helps the individual works. Depression? He's got a psych degree, I'm sure bro could give you some strategies. Autism? He has a touch of the 'tism himself. ADHD, and not feeling organized? Bro will help you. It's canon that he's a great fucking teacher - those who finish his classes go on to become successful people who are intelligent and critical thinkers. Round of applause for Ratio, the man that kins my father. He's shit at emotions, but great at knowledge.

Also, on that note, I believe that he would most likely hate parents that push thier "gifted" students to the limit without any compassion for the person that they really are. He's most definitely got some of that academic trauma so I believe that bro holds a secret disdain for parents who just use their children to gain more recgonition. Well, not so secret. He'd cuss them out. (Ratio please cuss out the horrible parents.)

Dr. Ratio, the Teacher ever. (Hey, maybe he'd get along with Kunikida...)

Also, I am definitely planning on making a fic where he teaches Aventurine Latin. As long as you're eager to learn and willing to look past the chalk being thrown, he's got a place for you.

Thanks for coming to my tedtalk. I did not read this through, so this is not edited. Take my unedited rambles.

[teecupangel]

I had this unhinged crossover idea, Desmond getting yeeted into left 4 dead. Consider this like a really, really late Halloween thing.

I hadn't thought too much on how things would play out for Desmond but all I know is he fucking hates it, he's thought he hated being the main target for Abstergo? Oh he's gonna hate the undead despite feeling a bit of sympathy for them.

I mean, the green flu appeared to have started slowly before things spiraled out of control continuing to evolve and further spread, and the next thing people knew, their loved ones were dropping like flies only to rise once more and begin just attacking out of nowhere. Heartbreaking to him but now his fight for survival just got worse, there's no innocents anymore, and survivors who were once kind and generous are now willing to kill other survivors just to stay safe and get supplies.

He did find some of the saferoom wall writing hilarious though, if he found a marker he totally adds his two cents in.

Absolutely hates the special infected, avoiding witches? He can manage that unless some idiot startles her, first encounter he had was not fun- he swore his heart stopped for a second hearing the witch screech. And don't get him started on the hunters, they boggle his mind and make him internally rage. Of all special infected, he's 100,000% certain if he drops and all he'd end up a hunter, and that thought terrifies him above all else.

Like, could you imagine that? Hunter!Desmond would be a freaking menace, and unlike other hunters who aren't all that silent due to his training and bleeding effects, his stealth goes above and beyond what the typical hunter is capable of. Nightmare fuel for sure.

Well, this is obviously a very late Halloween thing because I just answered this today XD

I have fond memories of L4D as it was the game me and my friends would play between classes if we were quite bored. I even play Back 4 Blood with my friend a few months back just to get back to that L4D feel (and also because it was one of the few games we both had that we could play together hahahaha).

Out of all the infected, I prefer being the Hunter so there’s definitely some bias when I say that I agree with you that Desmond would definitely be the worst kind of Hunter.

Made for stealth and speed, compounded by his unique genetics that makes him the closest Isu among the humans if we don’t count the Sages.

He wouldn’t just be a Hunter, he’d be a mutated Hunter.

One might even call him the Apex Hunter.

His vision would stay in a heightened state of Eagle Vision, unaffected by flashbangs or any kind of tools that might impede his visions or other senses.

The heightened state of Eagle Vision meant that not even walls can hide his preys and he has… ‘favorites’, one might say.

The Apex Hunter would prioritize hunting and turning specific humans.

Humans that would turn into Hunters as well, joining him with some kind of strange pack-like intuition.

To the humans, it would seem random and they won’t realize it but the Apex Hunter…

He turns those that glowed bright to him.

Those with higher Isu genes that the rest.

And it is those nightmares that plague Desmond’s sleep.

It makes him fear being infected.

Not that it was easy for him to be infected.

He wore a mask to cover his face and lessen the chance of being hit by blood or any kind of body fluids from those he takes down. He goes to the nearest museum and ransacks their historical weapon and armor displays, going for the chainmail and leather armor instead of a full metal armor. It was as light as he could get it while offering the necessary protections as he sometimes has no choice but to get into close combat with them.

He goes for weapons his Bleeds are familiar with, a hunting bow for stealth kills that wouldn’t alert the hordes, a sword with the nearest weight to what he was familiar with, a hunting dagger that he uses more as a utility tool than anything else and an emergency pistol he got from an undead police officer he took down.

He kept his identity a secret. There was no need to tell everyone he was Desmond Miles, not when he’s not sure yet if Abstergo had already been wiped out or if they’re not behind the scenes, protected by the best security money can buy.

He woke up alone, in a room that had enough clues for him to figure out that he was about to be dissected (or vivisected since he wasn’t dead yet).

No clues on where the Assassins were.

If there were even Assassins left.

All he knew was that he woke up and the world had turned into a post zombie apocalypse.

So he continues to travel, focusing on the rooftops to traverse and only making contact with other survivors when it was necessary (or if his kindness gets the better of him).

He does not give a name.

But his existence is whispered regardless.

The White Hood.

A man clad in a white hoodie with a blank mask that covers his entire face.

You know when you see him because…

His white clothes do not have a speck of blood at all.